• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to secondary sidebar

Betsy Brown Braun

Child Development and Behavior Specialist. Parent Educator. Best Selling Author

  • Home
  • What’s New
    • Upcoming Appearances
    • Video Seminars on Demand
    • In the News
    • Ask BBB – Columns from the Palisadian-Post
  • About
  • Services
    • Register Now
    • Private Consultations
      • Consultation Policies
    • Custody Consultation; Co-Parenting Planning/Implementation
    • Concierge Consulting
    • Parenting Seminars
    • In-Person Parenting Seminars
    • Video Seminars on Demand
    • Parenting Groups
    • Parenting Groups FALL 2021 through MAY 2022
    • Speaker and Seminar Topics
  • Recommendations
    • Betsy’s Books
    • Books Betsy Recommends
    • Special Children’s Books
    • Books: Special Issues
    • Articles
  • Betsyisms
    • Questions and Answers
    • Video Shorts
    • Video Seminars on Demand
    • Well Said
  • Blog
    • All Blog Entries
  • Testimonials
    • Parents
    • Pediatricians/Professionals
  • Media
    • Magazines
    • Television
    • Newspapers
    • Internet
    • Radio
    • Podcasts
    • Electronic Press Kit
  • Contact

Balancing Your Child’s Media Diet

by Betsy Brown Braun on November 1, 2009, under Parenting

Would you allow your child to eat and eat and eat, whatever and whenever he wanted?  Of course not.  It’s not much different with a child’s media intake.  Just like a parent implements portion and quality control with food, so must he implement the same controls with media.

It is a child’s rightful job to try to get the very most of whatever he likes the most, be it candy, television, computer time.  It takes many years for a child to develop the ability to see the big picture, thinking about why something might not be so good for him in the long run and applying that knowledge to his choices and behaviors. (And that ability, controlled by the prefrontal cortex of the brain, is not fully developed until a person is in his early twenties.) Therefore, your child needs you to put the brakes on for him.

Let me give you some real ammo for implementing a balanced diet.   Normal child development can actually be side tracked by too much media input (television, computer, DS, Xbox, Wii, etc…) Children’s brains are “in process.” They are constantly wiring and rewiring themselves. And they do so based on the experiences they are having. You know the old expression, “Use it or lose it?” Well, it’s true here, too.  If certain skills are not used, the brain will rewire itself to use the ones that are being practiced.  Children’s real life skills, the ones they need for functioning in the context of life—social interactions, problem solving, conflict resolution, compromise, reading emotion, etc..—can get rusty.  The neural pathways that have been well carved enabling these skills are plowed over, and the new skills developed for media intake take over.  The brains of young children are naturally wired for intimacy and socialization, for handling emotions, for interacting with people. That’s not something that should be side tracked. If fact, children need more experience with these, not less.

In this day of wanting to give your child every advantage, when a parent feels she may be depriving her child of something alllll the other kids have, it’s tough to limit media intake.  Children should certainly not be deprived of all that media. It is here to stay, and our children need to become media literate. It will be part of their lives.  The key, however, is the implementation of reasonable limits.

Just because your child is pining for a Wii doesn’t mean he must have one. And just because he has one, doesn’t mean he should be able to use it at will.  Before you say Absolutely not! Or Whatever you want! take the time to open the lines of communication. Listen to what your child wants, and share what you think is right for him. Create a win-win situation. Think about compromise. Set up a trial period, and be prepared to check in and see how it is going for both of you. This will be a great lesson in compromise and problem solving for you both, as well as strengthen you trusting relationship.

There are two caveats to keep in mind:

It is okay to say No! Children should not have everything they want. Learning to tolerate disappointment is a crucial life skill.

It is okay to have a goal. Longing is a potent motivator. Don’t deprive your child of the experience of longing for something, working to get it, and basking in his achievement of his own making.

Sometimes by taking away from the child, we are actually giving to him…just what he needs.

: balance, Balancing media, Children and media, Media, saying NO, TV watching
4 Comments

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. wii reviews says

    March 16, 2010 at 10:17 pm

    hey, found you on yahoo. really dig the site. keep up the good work!

  2. Betsy says

    March 19, 2010 at 8:14 pm

    So glad you are finding the site useful.

  3. Cythia Knoell says

    March 23, 2010 at 9:10 am

    Make sure you compose much more! This post was so in-depth and accurate. I genuinely liked reading through this post. Thanks!

  4. bezpieczny dom says

    July 27, 2011 at 9:36 am

    More useful text and I’m waiting for another one.

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

Primary Sidebar

Subscribe to receive news, articles and blogs from Betsy

Betsy is our modern-day version of the ‘village elder’ from whom we all seek counsel. Her suggestions have enabled me to respond to my children’s questions and curiosity in a way that respects their intelligence without confusing them.

- Paulina Ladreyt, mother of twin boys, Santa Monica, CA
Betsy Brown Braun
2019-06-21T14:30:37+00:00
Betsy is our modern-day version of the ‘village elder’ from whom we all seek counsel. Her suggestions have enabled me to respond to my children’s questions and curiosity in a way that respects their intelligence without confusing them. - Paulina Ladreyt, mother of twin boys, Santa Monica, CA
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5305/

Betsy Brown Braun’s class has been an incredible experience for me. Her wisdom, combined with a rare and wonderful sense of humor, has helped me become a better parent.

- Deborah Gleiberman, mother of three children
Betsy Brown Braun
2019-06-21T14:31:05+00:00
Betsy Brown Braun’s class has been an incredible experience for me. Her wisdom, combined with a rare and wonderful sense of humor, has helped me become a better parent. - Deborah Gleiberman, mother of three children
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5306/

Betsy is a wise, humorous, and caring advisor... Due in large part to Betsy, we are smarter parents and our children are happier and healthier as a result.

- Steven Webber, father of two boys
Betsy Brown Braun
2019-06-21T14:31:24+00:00
Betsy is a wise, humorous, and caring advisor... Due in large part to Betsy, we are smarter parents and our children are happier and healthier as a result. - Steven Webber, father of two boys
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5307/

Betsy Brown Braun is a master teacher and one of the wisest parenting experts I have ever known.

- Steven Carr Reuben, Ph.D., author of Children of Character
Betsy Brown Braun
2019-06-21T14:32:54+00:00
Betsy Brown Braun is a master teacher and one of the wisest parenting experts I have ever known. - Steven Carr Reuben, Ph.D., author of Children of Character
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5308/

Betsy is always able to come up with simple and unique approaches to common parenting problems as well as more complex issues. What she says makes good sense and always works...

- Joanna VanTrees Cowitt, mother of a boy and a girl, Los Angeles, CA
Betsy Brown Braun
2019-06-21T14:33:11+00:00
Betsy is always able to come up with simple and unique approaches to common parenting problems as well as more complex issues. What she says makes good sense and always works... - Joanna VanTrees Cowitt, mother of a boy and a girl, Los Angeles, CA
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5309/

I love the way you think and how clear you make the issues seem. You are so brilliant and I love how perceptive and straightforward you are. You anchor me and the things you say make a lot of sense.

- Leigh Nickoll, Marriage and Family Counselor
Betsy Brown Braun
2019-06-21T14:33:31+00:00
I love the way you think and how clear you make the issues seem. You are so brilliant and I love how perceptive and straightforward you are. You anchor me and the things you say make a lot of sense. - Leigh Nickoll, Marriage and Family Counselor
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5310/

Betsy’s private consultations are fabulous. She has a gift for understanding all different types of children and giving advice that works for your particular child.

- Craig Mallery
Betsy Brown Braun
2019-06-21T14:33:55+00:00
Betsy’s private consultations are fabulous. She has a gift for understanding all different types of children and giving advice that works for your particular child. - Craig Mallery
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5311/

Betsy got me over the bumps of raising two young boys and over the moguls of raising teenage boys. She is my rock.

- Deidra Hall
Betsy Brown Braun
2019-06-21T14:34:15+00:00
Betsy got me over the bumps of raising two young boys and over the moguls of raising teenage boys. She is my rock. - Deidra Hall
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5312/

Your talk really helped me in becoming a more “open” parent and less worried about little things that really don’t matter and restrict kids in a negative way.

- Nina Hong, mother
Betsy Brown Braun
2019-06-21T14:34:35+00:00
Your talk really helped me in becoming a more “open” parent and less worried about little things that really don’t matter and restrict kids in a negative way. - Nina Hong, mother
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5313/

Betsy keeps it real. She respects parents and children and gives parents the straight scoop about productive communication. I turn to her insights again and again.

- Alexis Bircoll Martin, mother of two
Betsy Brown Braun
2019-06-21T14:34:56+00:00
Betsy keeps it real. She respects parents and children and gives parents the straight scoop about productive communication. I turn to her insights again and again. - Alexis Bircoll Martin, mother of two
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5314/

Betsy Brown Braun is a fine observer of children…

- Dr. Robert M. Landaw, Pediatrician
Betsy Brown Braun
2019-06-21T14:35:16+00:00
Betsy Brown Braun is a fine observer of children… - Dr. Robert M. Landaw, Pediatrician
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5315/

Betsy offers the clearest, calming, and most helpful advice there is on parenting...She's like having the smartest, coolest, and amazingly right mom just a phone call away.

- Jane Buckingham, Author of The Modern Girls Guide to Life and The Modern Girls Guide to Motherhood
Betsy Brown Braun
2019-06-21T14:35:37+00:00
Betsy offers the clearest, calming, and most helpful advice there is on parenting...She's like having the smartest, coolest, and amazingly right mom just a phone call away. - Jane Buckingham, Author of The Modern Girls Guide to Life and The Modern Girls Guide to Motherhood
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5316/

A parenting guru.

- The New York Times
Betsy Brown Braun
2019-06-21T14:35:55+00:00
A parenting guru. - The New York Times
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5317/

We’ve been overwhelmed by the outpouring of positive response in our community from the PA Forum Betsy held for our Middle and High School parents. We are all discussing our implementation of her practical, meaningful advice - from how to respond to our teen's and tween’s meltdowns to how to deal with their messy rooms. Additionally she helped frame parenting (and over-parenting) during this challenging time as well as normalize our parental anxieties.Thank you Betsy!

- Leigh Morales, MS PA Forum Chair, The Greenhill School, Dallas TX
Betsy Brown Braun
2021-03-09T19:10:44+00:00
We’ve been overwhelmed by the outpouring of positive response in our community from the PA Forum Betsy held for our Middle and High School parents. We are all discussing our implementation of her practical, meaningful advice - from how to respond to our teen's and tween’s meltdowns to how to deal with their messy rooms. Additionally she helped frame parenting (and over-parenting) during this challenging time as well as normalize our parental anxieties.Thank you Betsy! - Leigh Morales, MS PA Forum Chair, The Greenhill School, Dallas TX
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5701/

Your voice is so often in my head as I navigate the adventures (good, bad, and yes, sometimes ugly) of parenting. I can’t imagine what I would have done all these years without it...it’s like a touchstone that keeps me on track

- Thea Andrews Wolf, mom of 2 middle school boys
Betsy Brown Braun
2022-02-03T07:33:32+00:00
Your voice is so often in my head as I navigate the adventures (good, bad, and yes, sometimes ugly) of parenting. I can’t imagine what I would have done all these years without it...it’s like a touchstone that keeps me on track - Thea Andrews Wolf, mom of 2 middle school boys
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5830/

You’re like a drug and it’s hard to get enough of your wisdom so thank you!

-Maryam Shahrokhi, Pediatrician in LA
Betsy Brown Braun
2022-03-01T09:52:11+00:00
You’re like a drug and it’s hard to get enough of your wisdom so thank you! -Maryam Shahrokhi, Pediatrician in LA
https://betsybrownbraun.com/testimonials/5861/
0
Betsy Brown Braun

Betsy Brown BraunFollow

Child development & behavior specialist, best selling author of award winning Just Tell Me What to Say (2008) & You're Not the Boss of Me. (2010)

Betsy Brown Braun
BetsyBBraunBetsy Brown Braun@BetsyBBraun·
7 Mar

Talking to kids of all ages about the war in Ukraine.https://betsybrownbraun.com/blog/

Reply on Twitter 1500911326691880961Retweet on Twitter 15009113266918809611Like on Twitter 15009113266918809612Twitter 1500911326691880961
Load More...

Secondary Sidebar

Seminars, groups and consulting
Engagements, media, presentations, and video seminars
Just Tell Me What to Say and You’re Not The Boss of Me. Buy them today!
On Demand Parenting Seminars.
Read the latest blog posts from Betsy.

Betsy Brown Braun

  • Home
  • What’s New
  • About
  • Services
  • Recommendations
  • Betsyisms
  • Blog
  • Testimonials
  • Media
  • Contact