Around the age of 4 years, most children begin to ask about death. It surfaces in their play, they say things like, “I’m gonna kill you,” they ask if you are going to die, among other questions and references. Unless they have experienced death at a younger age, this curiosity and sometime seeming obsessiveness are age appropriate and typical. It is a part of growing up. The answers to these questions are hard for all parents. No one wants to create fear or pain for her/his child. But … [Read more...] about Kobe Bryant’s Death: Talking to Kids About Premature Death
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My Child is a Hoarder!
"Daisy is a hoarder!" my daughter exclaimed in horror (and frustration). If I didn't know about kids and their typical development, I might agree with her. For Daisy, the world is filled with treasures. Whether it is a lost sequin spotted in the driveway, a set of Halloween vampire's teeth, a singular sticker from a coach, party favor junk, or another piece of plastic cr&p from the dentist's office, it is must be saved. Castoffs of all categories, shapes, colors, and sizes are for the … [Read more...] about My Child is a Hoarder!
No More Tattling!
In case you didn’t know, tattling should be illegal in your family. Many parents don’t realize that. When parents come to me for help with their kids’ fighting, I always ask is if their kids are tattletales. Just about 100% of the time the answer is YES! And they don’t even flinch at the look of horror on my face! The funny thing is, it’s parents who perpetuate the problem. Tattling is seen as necessary and useful. Believe me, it does more harm than help. Tattling at school and tattling … [Read more...] about No More Tattling!
Beyond the Birds and the Bees
It is always with great relief that moms and dads report back that explaining the birds and the bees to their elementary school age child wasn’t that bad. And despite their six year old's exclamation of "Eewww, gross!" at the mention of the man putting his penis the woman's vagina, Mom could breathe again. That was the beginning. As kids' bodies grow, so do their feelings— physical and emotional—their cognition, and their exposure to a world that includes sex. And there is much more than the … [Read more...] about Beyond the Birds and the Bees
Should You Discipline Someone Else’s Child….Revised
It’s hard enough to raise your own child—teaching him the rules of the road, guiding him as he learns how to “play nicely”—but what happens when a child who is not yours is in need of some pointed guidance (a swift kick in the pants!)? You’re having a playdate, and the guest grabs a toy (your child’s favorite Thomas car) out of your child’s hands. The grabber’s mom observes without reaction. You’re at the park, and a girl you don’t know throws sand at your child. The sand thrower’s mom is … [Read more...] about Should You Discipline Someone Else’s Child….Revised
Hurrying is the Enemy
The outing to Starbucks with our two year old grandtoddler was perfect. Not a glitch. No screaming, no crying, no collapsing into a heap, no refusal to walk, no running into the street, no running away. And not one single tantrum. The joys of being a grandparent. Admittedly, the walk which usually takes 15 minutes each way, took two hours. But it came off without a hitch. Why? I am no special grandparent. I have no tricks up my sleeve. (Ok. Well, maybe a few.) But what I do know is … [Read more...] about Hurrying is the Enemy