Years ago, I walked into the 4 year olds’ nursery school classroom and watched Mimi, a fabulous, feisty, third born child, collect all the playdough from the other three children at the table. The three were shocked; one protested loudly. Mimi looked up at me and said, “Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!” “Mimi,” I said, “Sorry isn’t enough.” Every time I hear a parent insist that her child apologize to another, I cringe, and I think about Mimi. Sorry is not enough. Teaching a child to say I’m sorry … [Read more...] about What’s Wrong with “I’m Sorry?”
It’s mid-August… that means summer vacation is creeping to an end, depending upon your child’s first day of school. For some it starts as soon as next week. Summer time and the livin’ was easy. Going, going, gone. For some students the thought of going back to school is exciting. They can hardly wait to start. For others, just the thought of school and summer ending feels kind of sad. Different kids, different feelings. On top of that, different age kids consider school-starting … [Read more...] about Helping to Smooth the Transition Back-to-School
Can this really be happening? Again? Every parent I know is feeling the same thing. The anxiety we already feel about our children’s safety when they are away from us is just getting worse and worse. The horror of the school shooting in Uvalde is, simply put, overwhelming. Too many times I have written blogs about how to talk with your child about shootings, school shootings in particular. This difference for me this time is the extent of my anger, my fury, my disgust, and my frustration. … [Read more...] about Oh No! Another Shooting to Talk to Kids About
When something “big” happens—a current or natural event-- I always write a blog, sharing with parents how to talk to their children about it. My website is filled with blog responses from over the last twenty years. I came very close to not writing a blog about the war in Ukraine, feeling like I have said it all. But I haven’t. My job is to help you help your children. This war in Ukraine is not going away quickly, as I prayed it would. The whole world is reacting. Children, elementary … [Read more...] about Your Children and the War in Ukraine
“How do you know when you are in love, I mean in love for real?” my daughter asked when she was about 13 years old. I have never forgotten the question nor my answer. With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, what better time to discuss? Over the years in my practice (and through my own kids’ growing years,) the questions of how children learn about love and relationships and what it’s all about have come up many times in many ways. Nothing is new. Parents have been teaching kids this … [Read more...] about How Do You Know When You’re in Love?
The camera slowly panned the faces of the St. Louis Cardinals, just moments after the Dodgers squashed their dream of being the baseball champions going to the Playoffs. Their faces reflected shock, disbelief, sadness, deep disappointment… just all of it. Back and forth, from the elated winning Dodger players to the dejected losing Cardinals, we saw "big feelings" on faces. What a great lesson this is going to be for so many kids, I thought, especially for those who are just plain old sore … [Read more...] about The Lessons of the Baseball Wildcard Playoffs