Was your parent one who asked, when you brought home an A-, “Why didn’t you get an A?” So many adults have a version of this tale to share. They have never forgotten it, twenty or thirty years later. Most children really do want their parents to be proud of them, proud for a variety of reasons. While we don’t actually remember the many times that they were, it is the composite of all those moments that contribute to the child feeling significant in his parents’ eyes. This is just one of the … [Read more...] about Roaring Back at the Tiger Mom
Excuse Me…and Dont’ Interrupt!
As often happens, over the weekend I ran into a client at the grocery store. Mid aisle we stopped for a brief greeting. As soon as the mom began to speak to me, her son piped up with, “Mom, Mom, can we get some Gatorade?” tugging at her jacket. “Please don’t interrupt me,” she calmly reminded her son and rewound the tape to complete her thought with me. “Excuse me. Excuse me, Mom? Mom? Excuse me.” he demanded. “Wait a minute, Steven. I am talking to Betsy,” Mom … [Read more...] about Excuse Me…and Dont’ Interrupt!
The Gift That Keeps On Giving
Every year my friend Freida gives me a surprising gift. Far out pop-up books, foodstuffs from the Homeboy Industries-Homegirl Catering and Kitchen, DVD’s of documentaries I might have missed. But this year’s is the best: Of Thee I Sing: A letter to my daughters by Barack Obama. I have been hearing about this book since its release, but shame on me for not reading it until now. It is my loss. Don’t let it be yours. Of Thee I Sing, a beautifully, joyfully illustrated book, will drop you … [Read more...] about The Gift That Keeps On Giving
Holiday Mistakes Parents Make
How many ways can I help you to rebrand the holidays? I'll try one more time by sending you to watch the video I taped for Parents Ask. Tuck the ideas away, and enjoy the rest of this holiday for now. Then when all is said and done, ponder the ideas I have offered about rebranding the holidays to be in keeping with your family values, moving from GimME to give you. Have a lovely holiday season. … [Read more...] about Holiday Mistakes Parents Make
The Experience of the Holidays
It’s all about gimme gimme gimme right about now, the middle of Chanukah and three weeks before Christmas. Well, of course it is, because the world—the media, advertisers, merchants—focus our children’s sights on the stuff they’re going to get. Ugh! In the end it is the experiences that define the holidays. Do you remember what you received when you were 7 or 8 or 9? Not likely. But you do remember what you always used to do with your family, year after year. Experiences in the form of … [Read more...] about The Experience of the Holidays
Your Child is “Shy” Around Strangers
An Interview with Betsy by Heidi Stevens of the Chicago Tribune Q: Your kindergartener is extremely shy around strangers. How do you get her to warm up to relatives she only sees at the holidays? Few topics are more complicated than family at the holidays, which is why Betsy Brown BraunÖ, author of “You're Not the Boss of Me: Brat-proofing Your Four- to Twelve-Year-Old Child” (Harper Paperbacks)Ö, suggests a four-pronged approach. No. 1. Change your language. “I never use the ‘s’ word,” … [Read more...] about Your Child is “Shy” Around Strangers