"Amanda is 2!" read the banner draped over the entrance to our neighborhood park. And that was just the beginning. A cooking area complete with printed aprons (“Amanda’s 2nd Birthday”) and chef's hats for each child, a craft area with three different creation stations, a pony ride with three steeds awaiting , a bounce house, a child's snack area, and an adult area replete with wine choices and gourmet treats served by men in black. Really? This was not a birthday party; this was a birthday … [Read more...] about Putting the Happy Back in Birthday
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Hurrying is the Enemy
The outing to Starbucks with our two year old grandtoddler was perfect. Not a glitch. No screaming, no crying, no collapsing into a heap, no refusal to walk, no running into the street, no running away. And not one single tantrum. The joys of being a grandparent. Admittedly, the walk which usually takes 15 minutes each way, took two hours. But it came off without a hitch. Why? I am no special grandparent. I have no tricks up my sleeve. (Ok. Well, maybe a few.) But what I do know is … [Read more...] about Hurrying is the Enemy
Back-to-School Blues
“I’m a wreck!” was the reply from my client, mother of two elementary school age kids, when I asked her how things were going. Her children had started back to school the week before. And, truth be told, they were doing great. Both liked their teachers, classes, friends, and were happily back in the ritual and routine of school days. There was a good reason for that. Children just seem to do so much better within the structure naturally imposed by being in school. Their predictable lives … [Read more...] about Back-to-School Blues
The After-Burn of Starting School
Summer time, and the livin’ is [was] easy, as the song goes. And there it went! There can be a whole lot more to starting school than starting school. Whether a child is beginning preschool, third grade, middle or high school, after a long summer or just an extended period at home, starting a school or going back to school is a big change and a big deal. It reverberates the most when the child is not actually at school. After a full day of changing classes, lining up, raising hands, … [Read more...] about The After-Burn of Starting School
The Problem with “It’s Not Fair.”
“It’s not fair!” Can’t you just hear the whiney tone that delivers that exclamation? I’ve yet to meet a parent whose child hasn’t at some point or other protested “That’s not faaaiiiiiirrrr?” (Note the drawn out faaaiiiirrrr, added for extra impact on you, the parent.) As common and grating as the phrase is, parents never figure why it doesn’t go away. Their response is to use logic. Upon hearing the cry, Mom uses logic, explaining why something is fair. Oh yes, it is fair because … [Read more...] about The Problem with “It’s Not Fair.”
Empathy is a Two Way Street
Cultivating empathy is a hot topic in the parenting world. Current research has demonstrated that children under a year not only have the capacity for empathy but actually exhibit empathy. (Regarding infants: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-athletes-way/201306/empathy-appears-in-infancy-varies-age-and-gender Regarding toddlers: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lX6krHsZA_w .) But parents, usually not educated to recognize and encourage this trait in their very young children, are … [Read more...] about Empathy is a Two Way Street