Beseeching your child to just give an activity a try, to practice the guitar she begged to take, to put in more effort on an assignment frustrates parents, lots of them. Parents frequently come to me with complaints about their child… who won’t try an activity because he fears won’t be good who has to be first or best who can’t cope with failure who doesn’t stick to an interest when he isn’t immediately successful who gives up easily who doesn’t give an activity enough … [Read more...] about “Just Give it a Try,” Pleaded the Father.
Character traits
Before It’s Too Late
The end of life of a very dear friend of mine for 54 years is on the horizon. Needless to say, it breaks my heart. I have been spending as much time with her as I can. Last week I sat down and wrote her a long, detailed, and descriptive letter. It was not to say goodbye; it was to say how much she means to me today and every day over the past 54 years. In fact, it was everything I would say about her at a Memorial. But I wanted her to hear and have it now. Writing that letter reminded me … [Read more...] about Before It’s Too Late
Turn ON the TV…Lessons of the Olympics
Turn OFF the television and spend real time with your children! How many times have I preached this advice to parents? Today I am doing an about face. It’s time to turn ON the television … to watch the Olympics. Parents frequently come to me with complaints about their child… who has to be first or best who can’t cope with failure who doesn’t stick to an interest when he isn’t immediately successful who won’t try something new for fear of not being good who gives up … [Read more...] about Turn ON the TV…Lessons of the Olympics
Teaching Civility: What the Queen’s Funeral Taught Me About Raising Kids
I was transfixed by the coverage of Queen Elizabeth’s death and funeral proceedings. The pageantry, the ritual, the lock steps, the salutes, the uniforms…I was mesmerized. The English loved their queen. Her passing marked the end of a 70 year relationship, and so many were really sad. Children watched their parents weep, curtsy, and bow their heads in silence. Their parents’ motions were the language of their feelings as they demonstrated their respect for the crown. While the … [Read more...] about Teaching Civility: What the Queen’s Funeral Taught Me About Raising Kids
What’s Wrong with “I’m Sorry?”
Years ago, I walked into the 4 year olds’ nursery school classroom and watched Mimi, a fabulous, feisty, third born child, collect all the playdough from the other three children at the table. The three were shocked; one protested loudly. Mimi looked up at me and said, “Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!” “Mimi,” I said, “Sorry isn’t enough.” Every time I hear a parent insist that her child apologize to another, I cringe, and I think about Mimi. Sorry is not enough. Teaching a child to say I’m sorry … [Read more...] about What’s Wrong with “I’m Sorry?”
The Lessons of the Baseball Wildcard Playoffs
The camera slowly panned the faces of the St. Louis Cardinals, just moments after the Dodgers squashed their dream of being the baseball champions going to the Playoffs. Their faces reflected shock, disbelief, sadness, deep disappointment… just all of it. Back and forth, from the elated winning Dodger players to the dejected losing Cardinals, we saw "big feelings" on faces. What a great lesson this is going to be for so many kids, I thought, especially for those who are just plain old sore … [Read more...] about The Lessons of the Baseball Wildcard Playoffs